Theodore's (Teddy's) Birth Story

Now that Teddy is 3 months old, I thought I'd finally get to writing out his birth story. I know I haven't posted anything in like 2 1/2 years but this is the best place to store this for my memory.

So it all started the morning of June 30th. I had woken up at around 4 am needing to go to the bathroom but afterwards, I couldn't go back to sleep because I was so uncomfortable. I had a couple contractions but not much. Adam woke up too and couldn't fall back asleep so he kept me company for a bit. Around 5, my contractions started getting consistent and stronger with some back pain. This went on for a couple hours so I texted our doula Meagan to let her know this probably was it. After another few contractions, we texted her to come over and help with the labor and then after another couple contractions, we just told her to meet us at the hospital haha.

We got there about a quarter after 8 and they did a check and I was at 2 cm. I had been at 2 a couple days before at my doctor's appointment so they asked if I wanted to stay or go home. I felt like this was a weird question because my contractions were still a few minutes apart. I asked the nurse how I would know to go back to the hospital when the usual indication (close contractions) was already happening haha. She couldn't tell me so I decided to just stay. Meagan got to the hospital and we just worked on hypnobirthing scripts while I labored. After a couple hours of laboring (around 11 am), I was checked again and was at 4 cm so they officially admitted me. My doctor came in as well and we decided to just keep laboring naturally.

I did a little bit of laboring on the exercise ball and just standing and walking but around noon, I decided to labor in the bathtub. I had decided to do wireless monitoring but it was a struggle to get Teddy's heartbeat. He was kind of diagonal inside me and kept on moving so as soon as they got the right spot, he wiggled away. So throughout labor, they kept coming in and trying to hold the monitors in place. At around a quarter after 2, the water got cold so I decided to get checked while I waited for the tub to refill. Sadly I was still at a 4 so I went back in the tub to continue laboring.

At 3:30, I got out of the bath. I was feeling quite a bit discouraged that labor wasn't progressing very well. I was super tired and struggling to stay focused. We all talked with the nurse about what options I had in terms of pain management and trying to get labor moving. Most likely they'd want to start pitocin and/or break my water if I got an epidural. I was super scared about the epidural after getting a spinal headache with Eli so I didn't know what to do. I got some time to talk privately with Adam about it all. Everyone kept repeating that it was up to me which didn't make it easier haha. We talked about what made Eli's birth so hard because I was worried another difficult birth would lead to postpartum depression again. One thing I knew I wanted was to be present during and after delivery. I didn't want to be so completely exhausted and broken by the time I met Teddy and that was the most important thing for me. Dr. Huggins had said that the bath could've possibly slowed my labor so I decided to wait a bit longer but I was more comfortable with the idea of interventions.

At 4:30, they checked me again and I was only at a 4 1/2. I was super discouraged and tired of listening to hypnobirthing scripts so Adam suggested we try to more upbeat music. So basically we had a dance party while I bounced on the ball and listened to music. With every contraction, we would pause and switch gears back to relaxing and Meagan would give me counter pressure. After awhile, I felt like the contractions were getting worse and I was struggling to handle them so I decided to get an epidural.

Around 6, the anesthetist came to get the epidural set up. I was super anxious because I hate needles and having to hold perfectly still while having intense contractions as a needle goes into your back is the worse thing ever. Once he got it in, I started to feel like I was going to pass out and my blood pressure dramatically dropped. They hurried to lay me down and they gave me some medicine in my IV to raise my blood pressure but that made my heart race and it felt like a panic attack. Luckily though, Teddy stayed fine during the whole process. The problem then became that I was only feeling the epidural in my left leg. So my whole right side, back, and my abdomen could feel every contraction still. They tried laying me on my right side to help it work more evenly and it helped a little bit but I still felt it all. At 7, the anesthetist came back in and upped the dosage which made it help a little in my crotch and back but my entire abdomen felt contractions still. This made it super difficult to consciously relax my muscles during contractions because I felt some parts but not others so the contractions felt worse.

At 7:30, they started the lowest possible pitocin drip and the craziness ensued. Teddy's heart rate decreased because of it so they stopped it. Ten minutes later, Meagan came back from her dinner break and saw nurses rushing in. Teddy's heart rate was staying too low so everyone started to worry. They checked me again and I was at a 5 1/2 and very thin. I didn't really know what was going on but they had me on my side, gave me oxygen, and kept telling me to take deep breaths. At 7:47, Dr. Huggins came in and said she needed to break my water because Teddy's heart rate wasn’t going up and there were times where they couldn't get a reading. During this time, they hadn't really told me what was going on so I was confused. Meagan told me about the heart rate issue and that we needed to speed things up. Dr. Huggins broke my water and I was still at a 5 1/2 so she and Meagan were worried that she'd have to do a c-section. Dr. Huggins placed an internal fetal monitor in Teddy's head to make sure we had a good reading but the heart rate was still low. As her hand was still inside of me holding the monitor in place, she then had a look of shock, her hand jutted out by a couple inches and said the baby was coming now. Her hand had been pushed out by Teddy's head. Adam and I were super confused because it had been just a minute before that she said I was at a 5 1/2. I felt my body starting to push and all I could do was keep yelling out "what is happening?!" haha. Adam was confused and so he looked and saw Teddy's head. He then kind of grabbed my face so I could focus and told me that Teddy was coming right now and he could see his head. I pushed for a contraction and his head was out and the shoulders came the next push. At 7:53, they placed Teddy on my chest and I was in shock. After the placenta was delivered and I calmed down, they had to explain to me what happened. Apparently after breaking my water and while Dr. Huggins' hand was inside of me, she felt my cervix go from 5 cm to 10 cm in a second. SO crazy!! Teddy was perfectly healthy and didn't seem to have any effects from the heart rate issue and also there didn't seem to be any reason for the deceleration other than the pitocin. I was just so grateful to have Teddy outside of me and finally be done with pregnancy and birth!

Postpartum went pretty smoothly minus the epidural lingering for a long time and so I fell when they made me go to bathroom and they didn't take my word for it that my leg was still numb. Breastfeeding went pretty much the same way that it did with Wesley but a couple weeks after birth, he got the hang of it. So that's his story! It was definitely unforgettable haha.

December Update

Here is how last month went!

Adam and Ashley: Adam has been feeling better with his clot which has been great. Mostly we have spent the month trying to make a magical Christmas for Eli :)

Eli: Mostly he spent the month working on potty training and getting super excited for Christmas. He has been doing pretty good except for #2. But he has used the potty outside of the home as well which is nice. It is still a work in progress and I still have to rinse out underwear. He is such a creative silly boy and always says the FUNNIEST things. I usually document them on Facebook for others' enjoyment as well as for my future reference. I have loved seeing how his mind works and how he processes information and remembers things. He also loves to make us laugh!

Wesley: is now 6 1/2 months old! He is getting so big and is about 18 pounds. He is super social and is at his happiest when he's surrounded by his family. He is not crawling but he does pretty well rolling over and over to get to places. No teeth yet but lots of drool, fussiness, and biting everything. He has also become a thumb sucker. It is fun to see the differences between him and how Eli was at that age. One of the most noticeable differences is that his hair is a lot darker but recently as its gotten longer, it has started to curl! Its freaking adorable haha.

Christmas: This year was by far the most magical year with kids so far. Eli totally understands Santa and is enraptured by all that is Christmas. So, we tried to do a lot of fun things. We went to the downtown Christmas village lighting. We went caroling with some friends and made lots of yummy treats to hand out. We looked at some amazing lights around town. And of course, talked about Santa a lot haha. In addition to all of this, Adam and I sang in our ward choir for their Christmas program and Adam sang in a little men's ensemble. We went to a few parties as well. The best part of course was seeing Eli's excitement Christmas morning. He was amazed to see that Santa ate the cookies, the reindeer ate the carrots, and that his stocking was all filled. We also began one of Adam's childhood tradition of not writing names on presents. Instead, there are numbers and then we only find out who it is to and from, once we pick them out to open that morning. Eli thoroughly enjoyed that but did not enjoy us going back and forth between present opening and making our traditional Christmas morning quiche. But overall, it was amazing.

Anniversary: We celebrated our 7th wedding anniversary on the 29th! My wonderful aunt watched the boys so we could go to lunch, see the new Fantastic Beasts movie, go to the temple to do sealings, and go get treats afterward :)

November Update

Here is how last month went!

Adam and Ashley: We had a bit of a scare last month when Adam started getting pain in his leg that was very similar to when he had his blood clots last year. Luckily, he got an appointment as soon as possible and they scheduled an ultrasound. It turns out he did have a blood clot but it was a lot more superficial than the other ones he had that were deep vein thrombosis. So he is back on blood thinners for a month but that should be all. He is going to see if he can get an adjustable desk that he can stand while working too to see if that will help. But at least he wasn't laid up in pain as long as we was last time. I have been juggling the kids as always and dealing with something new with Eli which has kept me very busy and stressed out and you will read about it below.

Eli: The biggest thing this month is that we began potty training! This is one step of parenting that I had been DREADING! We probably put it off too long but we finally started. We had been reading a book (Oh Crap Potty Training) on potty training that we had for while to give us some kind of framework to work through. So we started with barricading the kitchen for a couple days and doing naked time. That worked for a bit until the novelty wore off for Eli. He got pretty good at pee but hadn't pooped at all. We decided to move onto the next step the book recommended which was commando time. Meanwhile, we put him in diapers for nap and bedtime. The book was so adamant about what you should and shouldn't do that it was starting to stress me out. Also, Eli would throw a fit every time we took the diaper off, plus he didn't like going commando. So we decided to look into other methods. A friend sent me information about a 3 Day potty training method, so we kinda switched gears. Instead what we did was put him in underwear, got rid of all diapers, bought some m&ms for rewards (the first book said no rewards), and hoped for the best. I definitely had to prepare myself mentally that there was going to be a ton of accidents and just have the carpet cleaner at the ready and keep trying. This seemed to click for him and he loved the underwear. He got pretty good at self-prompting whenever he had to go pee and accidents became fewer and fewer. The first book recommended waking him up to pee in the middle of the night and I am SO glad we didn't. Instead we just put him in underwear and expected to wake up to an accident. Instead, he kept dry the whole night but only had an accident when he first woke up and we didn't get him fast enough. We keep him in his room using a door knob cover because otherwise he'd never stay in his room and he calls for us through the vent because our room is below his. So I knew the accident was after he woke up because of where it was on the carpet. But every day he got better and better and now rarely has an pee accident. Poop however is 0% still. I don't know what to do to get him to poop on the potty and I'm so sick of rinsing his underwear but we are just trying to keep going with it. If anyone has suggestions, let me know! Sorry if this was all TMI but I'm also recording this for my memory and use for future kids. We are so proud of Eli and how he has transitioned to peeing in the potty though. On another note, he is also SUPER excited for Christmas and finally understands traditions and Santa which has been fun :)

Wesley: is 5 1/2 months old! He frequently rolls from back to tummy and desperately wants to crawl. He can scoot a little bit but mostly backwards and he pivots or rolls around a bit. It is just not enough for him to not get frustrated. We're thinking he will start crawling by Christmas. He has also begun the glorious and seemingly never ending stage of teething. He is constantly biting on everything, drooling a ton, and getting more fussy. Towards the end of the month we saw a little white corner of a tooth that has not broken through yet. Poor guy is so miserable sometimes :( But when he is happy, his smiles and laughs are magical. He LOVES Eli and constantly watches him while laughing and smiling. And Eli does great with it about 90% of the time haha. It is so hard to believe that we're coming up to half of a year that he's been outside of me! I definitely can't imagine our family without him.

Cat sitting: The first week of the month we took care of a friend's cat while they were out of town. I have never lived with a cat or dog so it was definitely a learning experience haha. Eli was OBSESSED and still talks about him. Luckily the cat was used to little kids so he was a good sport. He was a very social cat as well and loved following us around the house. The first night, we let him sleep with us and he decided to shove in between Adam and I or sit on my head and paw at my hair haha. Needless to say, we closed our door the other nights haha. But it was fun to have a cute kitty around for a bit!

Thanksgiving: We spent this year with my aunts and grandpa that live in Blackfoot! It was so nice to be around my family and the food was delicious. We played games, tried to keep track of Eli's potty training, and had fun watching my little cousin who is about 9 months older than Wesley walk around and wonder what this strange little baby was haha.

September and October Update

Last year I did this same thing. Procrastinated my September post until we were over halfway done with October haha. So here’s a combination of what’s been going on in the last two months!

Adam and Ashley: we’ve just been keeping on and trying to get into a family of four swing. Adam has his student employees back which has helped decrease quite a bit of stress. Also he is officially blood clot free! I am honestly still struggling to balance two kids during the day. I get burnt out super easy and have been down more often recently. Hopefully it’ll get better.

Eli: has been super into creative play. He’s always wanting to play pretend and it is adorable to see his imagination at work. He loves to learn all sorts of new things and has a wonderful memory. He also loves to play with Wesley and make him laugh.

Wesley: is now four and a half months old! He can roll from tummy to back and has great head control. He LOVES his family and the three of us gets his biggest smiles. He is ticklish and laughs super hard when I kiss his cheeks and neck. He has found his voice and likes to squeal and scream SUPER loud haha. And more often than not it’s because he’s happy! He is a complete drool monster and is constantly drenched. He also sucks on his hands all the time. No teeth yet and no sleeping through the night. He’s about 15 pounds now and still growing! We love our little guy!

Highlights!

my nephew loving on Wesley

Utah Trip #1: For Labor Day weekend, we took a quick trip to Utah! We stayed with my sister and also went to a big get together with my Packard relatives because it was my great-aunt’s 100th birthday 😊

My birthday: The Saturday before my birthday, we got to go to the Eastern Idaho State Fair! My aunt and uncle came too and they were so sweet to watch the boys so Adam and I could indulge on rides. We had a ton of fun seeing animals, eating fried food, and taking Eli on some rides! Then on my actual birthday, we got a babysitter and went to Adam’s yearly employee banquet 😊

at the Eastern Idaho State Fair

second trip to UT

Utah Trip #2: The first weekend of October, we went back to Utah! We gave ourselves a couple more days to see more people. This time we stayed with Adam’s brother who is pretty much the coolest person in Eli’s eyes haha. We were able to visit campus and meet up with the office that we worked at as students. We also visited the mental health clinic that I worked at since they moved to a brand new building. My sister and husband were in Russia but my mom and aunt were watching my nephew so we were able to spend time with them and watch General Conference. The main reason for coming to Utah however was  that Adam’s mission president was holding a mission reunion and it was ten years since Adam had left for his church mission to Manchester England.

at the pumpkin patch

Visitors: My best friend Kayla was able to visit and spend a day in October with us which was so fun! Her little boy is 9 months younger than Eli and they love each other. We went to the zoo and to a pumpkin patch and the boys had a blast! Later that month, we were able to see Adam’s mom a couple times. Once on her birthday to have lunch and go get cookie dough at Soda Barn. Then again when she stayed a night with us before heading back to Colorado.

Halloween: Eli said that he wanted to be a superhero for Halloween but of course once we actually got the costume in the mail, he changed his mind. So he ended up being a lion again this year. Wesley was a cute chubby turtle. We went again to the building Adam works in at BYU-Idaho to go trick or treating. It’s the perfect amount for Eli and mostly indoors so we didn’t go out in our neighborhood. Eli did have fun handing out candy though :)

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August Update

Now that September is half over, I thought it was about time for me to do a quick update on our August haha

Adam and Ashley: nothing too new with us just getting more used to having to deal with two kids and less sleep haha. Adam has been quite busy at work to meet deadlines for the coming semester as well as BYU-Idaho’s big transition to a new Learning Management System. He has definitely gained a stronger appreciation for student employees as both of his left for summer break. As for me, I’ve mostly been trying to survive without too much TV for Eli (not always successful with that xP)

Eli: turned 3 this month!! Adam took the day off so we could do some fun things. We went to the zoo which Eli LOVED and we decided to get a membership so we can go more often. That evening we had a little party with some family and friends. Eli loves running around with his friends. As he requested, I made red monster truck cupcakes which he still mentions from time to time. I can’t believe how big he is! This month he’s been super excited to learn his letters! He can sing the song and identify most capital letters on sight. He can be a little scamp most of the time but he’s cute too :)

Wesley: turned two months old mid-month. At the very beginning of the month, he got his tongue and lip tie clipped so that was not fun. He had quite a rough time of it but I think it’s helped a little. I’m a little worried that it reattached a little but he still seems to be getting better at catching my fast flow. He is a happy smiley baby especially when he has people paying attention to him haha. His head control is getting less wobbly and he weighed in at 12.5 pounds at his two month appointment!

 

My Postpartum With Wesley

Now that it’s three months since I had Wesley, I should finally get around to writing about my postpartum recovery which I was meaning to do!

In the hospital: After giving birth, I was so relieved but also my muscles were super sore. Luckily I had the after baby high for a bit but when that wore off, my body ached. My sweet nurse offered to draw me a bath to help relax the soreness and oh my gosh that was the BEST IDEA EVER! I felt so much better afterwards. One thing about doing it unmedicated was that my recovery was so much easier! I could walk around easily and no spinal headache like I had with Eli. We were even thinking about leaving the hospital earlier than the usual 48 hours but I’m glad we didn’t. It gave Wesley a little bit more time to adjust and I got some more breastfeeding support. So we stayed Saturday night and Sunday night. Monday morning, I woke up to my milk having come in very strongly. With a nipple shield and a hand pump, we were able to at least relieve me a bit. I did have some trouble with anxiety on Saturday and I think that was a bit exacerbated by my milk coming in.

At home: The first week was quite hellish. I have figured out that my body does NOT react well to the abrupt change in hormones after having a baby. I did not know what to expect when I had Eli so I crashed and burned because of it. Luckily, this time I just slipped and fell a bit. I struggled with anxiety and I could almost feel the hormones in my body causing it. It led to me struggling to sleep even when circumstances allowed me to. This also made my anxiety get worse. I went to my OB office and they gave me some medicine to help cope which it did but only after a few days. The anxiety peaked Thursday night when I was up all night long having panic attack after panic attack. It was like my body was on overload and would not calm down. This led to depression starting to creep in along with bad thoughts which scared me but because of Eli, I wasn’t taken off guard. When morning came, we decided to take me to the ER so that I could reset. I talked with a counselor and they gave me some stronger medicine there that would help me sleep right away. I was able to sleep for 6 hours straight while my angel mom, husband, and aunt helped take care of the boys. This reset plus the other medicine starting to work helped me feel better. Also the hormones leveling out probably made the biggest difference. 

Overall, this time was a ton better than with Eli. I was able to catch things earlier, had extra help with Adam off work and my mom staying with us, and I was able to have a better perspective on things. With Eli, it surprised and scared me to feel so out of control which made the depression worse. Plus I didn’t have as much help and Adam wasn’t prepared for it. This time around, I knew that my body was going through major changes so I didn’t expect to feel like myself. Mostly I just needed to find a way to calm my body down so it didn’t react as if the house was on fire. I only needed to take something to help me sleep for a few days until things got better. Even though postpartum is difficult no matter what, I think I can safely say I haven’t had postpartum depression this time! I am so glad because it has allowed for me to bond with Wesley better and establish breastfeeding. Hopefully, I will be able to use these tools to have an even better time with any future babies! Even if my body seems to be allergic to postpartum hormones haha

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July Update

Here is how this past month went!

Adam: turned 29 this month!! We celebrated by having a get together with some family in the afternoon and then that evening we went to find a spot to watch the local fireworks show (while trying to avoid parking and traffic). The day after he got a special visit from his brother Seth and his family. That was probably his favorite birthday gift because we had someone to play games with haha. He also went back to work and has been amazing at balancing his work stresses, home stresses, and lack of sleep. He is a HUGE support for me breastfeeding as well. We kinda gave up on him taking a feeding since I'd have to wake up to pump anyways but he always gets Wesley and brings him to me and also settles him down if he needs it. He is the best husband and father.

Ashley: I spent the first half of the month trying to find a new normal with Adam at work while trying to prepare for family visiting. The second half of the month, I had to find a NEW new normal because my mom had left after staying with us for a month from when Wesley was born. It was kind of intimidating being home all day with the boys by myself at first but we're getting used to it haha. I am SOOOOO grateful that my mom could come and help for such a long time. It was such a sacrifice of her energy and time but made a huge difference in how my postpartum time went.

Eli: has LOVED having family visit. He enjoyed my mom being here and was ecstatic when all of his grandparents were here along with his aunts, uncles, and cousin on my side and two uncles and aunts and a cousin on Adam's side all came to visit this month. Honestly, I was expecting a full on meltdown when everyone left after the blessing but he did so well saying goodbye. He's definitely growing up in a lot of ways! He's especially gotten more into creative pretend play recently. He will often give me cars and have conversations between them and his cars haha. I love seeing his imagination grow and process things. He loves Wesley and hasn't been too jealous of him. More often than not, he gets mad because he wants to do things like hold and feed him but he can't. It will be fun to see if they'll play well once Wesley can actually play haha.

Wesley: turned 1 month old this month! His head control is getting better but still quite wobbly. He also started smiling this month! That of course is my favorite :) He's a good eater except when my milk comes out too fast. Then he unlatches and gets sprayed in the face haha. We're still troubleshooting how to help his perpetual gassiness but we're pretty sure its my overactive letdown. He has started balding on top and looks like an old man. His favorite thing is to sit on my lap with his back leaning against my thighs as I sit with my knees up. He loves to see our faces and that is how we get the most smiles. He still wakes up quite a few times at night but occasionally will go a 3 or 4 hour stretch! He is a super sweet baby and is now over 11 lbs already so he's quickly becoming a chunk!

Special Events This Month
Fourth of July and Adam's birthday as mentioned above :)
We had Wesley's baby blessing! We were so happy that so many family were able to travel to share it with us. We definitely had a packed house that weekend! It was also the first time my whole family had been together now that Jessica is married (and of course Wesley joining us). So we had to get a family photo which was interesting with a kindergartner and a toddler to try and contain haha. It was a fun, crazy, happy weekend!