November Update

Here is how last month went!

Adam and Ashley: We had a bit of a scare last month when Adam started getting pain in his leg that was very similar to when he had his blood clots last year. Luckily, he got an appointment as soon as possible and they scheduled an ultrasound. It turns out he did have a blood clot but it was a lot more superficial than the other ones he had that were deep vein thrombosis. So he is back on blood thinners for a month but that should be all. He is going to see if he can get an adjustable desk that he can stand while working too to see if that will help. But at least he wasn't laid up in pain as long as we was last time. I have been juggling the kids as always and dealing with something new with Eli which has kept me very busy and stressed out and you will read about it below.

Eli: The biggest thing this month is that we began potty training! This is one step of parenting that I had been DREADING! We probably put it off too long but we finally started. We had been reading a book (Oh Crap Potty Training) on potty training that we had for while to give us some kind of framework to work through. So we started with barricading the kitchen for a couple days and doing naked time. That worked for a bit until the novelty wore off for Eli. He got pretty good at pee but hadn't pooped at all. We decided to move onto the next step the book recommended which was commando time. Meanwhile, we put him in diapers for nap and bedtime. The book was so adamant about what you should and shouldn't do that it was starting to stress me out. Also, Eli would throw a fit every time we took the diaper off, plus he didn't like going commando. So we decided to look into other methods. A friend sent me information about a 3 Day potty training method, so we kinda switched gears. Instead what we did was put him in underwear, got rid of all diapers, bought some m&ms for rewards (the first book said no rewards), and hoped for the best. I definitely had to prepare myself mentally that there was going to be a ton of accidents and just have the carpet cleaner at the ready and keep trying. This seemed to click for him and he loved the underwear. He got pretty good at self-prompting whenever he had to go pee and accidents became fewer and fewer. The first book recommended waking him up to pee in the middle of the night and I am SO glad we didn't. Instead we just put him in underwear and expected to wake up to an accident. Instead, he kept dry the whole night but only had an accident when he first woke up and we didn't get him fast enough. We keep him in his room using a door knob cover because otherwise he'd never stay in his room and he calls for us through the vent because our room is below his. So I knew the accident was after he woke up because of where it was on the carpet. But every day he got better and better and now rarely has an pee accident. Poop however is 0% still. I don't know what to do to get him to poop on the potty and I'm so sick of rinsing his underwear but we are just trying to keep going with it. If anyone has suggestions, let me know! Sorry if this was all TMI but I'm also recording this for my memory and use for future kids. We are so proud of Eli and how he has transitioned to peeing in the potty though. On another note, he is also SUPER excited for Christmas and finally understands traditions and Santa which has been fun :)

Wesley: is 5 1/2 months old! He frequently rolls from back to tummy and desperately wants to crawl. He can scoot a little bit but mostly backwards and he pivots or rolls around a bit. It is just not enough for him to not get frustrated. We're thinking he will start crawling by Christmas. He has also begun the glorious and seemingly never ending stage of teething. He is constantly biting on everything, drooling a ton, and getting more fussy. Towards the end of the month we saw a little white corner of a tooth that has not broken through yet. Poor guy is so miserable sometimes :( But when he is happy, his smiles and laughs are magical. He LOVES Eli and constantly watches him while laughing and smiling. And Eli does great with it about 90% of the time haha. It is so hard to believe that we're coming up to half of a year that he's been outside of me! I definitely can't imagine our family without him.

Cat sitting: The first week of the month we took care of a friend's cat while they were out of town. I have never lived with a cat or dog so it was definitely a learning experience haha. Eli was OBSESSED and still talks about him. Luckily the cat was used to little kids so he was a good sport. He was a very social cat as well and loved following us around the house. The first night, we let him sleep with us and he decided to shove in between Adam and I or sit on my head and paw at my hair haha. Needless to say, we closed our door the other nights haha. But it was fun to have a cute kitty around for a bit!

Thanksgiving: We spent this year with my aunts and grandpa that live in Blackfoot! It was so nice to be around my family and the food was delicious. We played games, tried to keep track of Eli's potty training, and had fun watching my little cousin who is about 9 months older than Wesley walk around and wonder what this strange little baby was haha.

September and October Update

Last year I did this same thing. Procrastinated my September post until we were over halfway done with October haha. So here’s a combination of what’s been going on in the last two months!

Adam and Ashley: we’ve just been keeping on and trying to get into a family of four swing. Adam has his student employees back which has helped decrease quite a bit of stress. Also he is officially blood clot free! I am honestly still struggling to balance two kids during the day. I get burnt out super easy and have been down more often recently. Hopefully it’ll get better.

Eli: has been super into creative play. He’s always wanting to play pretend and it is adorable to see his imagination at work. He loves to learn all sorts of new things and has a wonderful memory. He also loves to play with Wesley and make him laugh.

Wesley: is now four and a half months old! He can roll from tummy to back and has great head control. He LOVES his family and the three of us gets his biggest smiles. He is ticklish and laughs super hard when I kiss his cheeks and neck. He has found his voice and likes to squeal and scream SUPER loud haha. And more often than not it’s because he’s happy! He is a complete drool monster and is constantly drenched. He also sucks on his hands all the time. No teeth yet and no sleeping through the night. He’s about 15 pounds now and still growing! We love our little guy!

Highlights!

my nephew loving on Wesley

Utah Trip #1: For Labor Day weekend, we took a quick trip to Utah! We stayed with my sister and also went to a big get together with my Packard relatives because it was my great-aunt’s 100th birthday 😊

My birthday: The Saturday before my birthday, we got to go to the Eastern Idaho State Fair! My aunt and uncle came too and they were so sweet to watch the boys so Adam and I could indulge on rides. We had a ton of fun seeing animals, eating fried food, and taking Eli on some rides! Then on my actual birthday, we got a babysitter and went to Adam’s yearly employee banquet 😊

at the Eastern Idaho State Fair

second trip to UT

Utah Trip #2: The first weekend of October, we went back to Utah! We gave ourselves a couple more days to see more people. This time we stayed with Adam’s brother who is pretty much the coolest person in Eli’s eyes haha. We were able to visit campus and meet up with the office that we worked at as students. We also visited the mental health clinic that I worked at since they moved to a brand new building. My sister and husband were in Russia but my mom and aunt were watching my nephew so we were able to spend time with them and watch General Conference. The main reason for coming to Utah however was  that Adam’s mission president was holding a mission reunion and it was ten years since Adam had left for his church mission to Manchester England.

at the pumpkin patch

Visitors: My best friend Kayla was able to visit and spend a day in October with us which was so fun! Her little boy is 9 months younger than Eli and they love each other. We went to the zoo and to a pumpkin patch and the boys had a blast! Later that month, we were able to see Adam’s mom a couple times. Once on her birthday to have lunch and go get cookie dough at Soda Barn. Then again when she stayed a night with us before heading back to Colorado.

Halloween: Eli said that he wanted to be a superhero for Halloween but of course once we actually got the costume in the mail, he changed his mind. So he ended up being a lion again this year. Wesley was a cute chubby turtle. We went again to the building Adam works in at BYU-Idaho to go trick or treating. It’s the perfect amount for Eli and mostly indoors so we didn’t go out in our neighborhood. Eli did have fun handing out candy though :)

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August Update

Now that September is half over, I thought it was about time for me to do a quick update on our August haha

Adam and Ashley: nothing too new with us just getting more used to having to deal with two kids and less sleep haha. Adam has been quite busy at work to meet deadlines for the coming semester as well as BYU-Idaho’s big transition to a new Learning Management System. He has definitely gained a stronger appreciation for student employees as both of his left for summer break. As for me, I’ve mostly been trying to survive without too much TV for Eli (not always successful with that xP)

Eli: turned 3 this month!! Adam took the day off so we could do some fun things. We went to the zoo which Eli LOVED and we decided to get a membership so we can go more often. That evening we had a little party with some family and friends. Eli loves running around with his friends. As he requested, I made red monster truck cupcakes which he still mentions from time to time. I can’t believe how big he is! This month he’s been super excited to learn his letters! He can sing the song and identify most capital letters on sight. He can be a little scamp most of the time but he’s cute too :)

Wesley: turned two months old mid-month. At the very beginning of the month, he got his tongue and lip tie clipped so that was not fun. He had quite a rough time of it but I think it’s helped a little. I’m a little worried that it reattached a little but he still seems to be getting better at catching my fast flow. He is a happy smiley baby especially when he has people paying attention to him haha. His head control is getting less wobbly and he weighed in at 12.5 pounds at his two month appointment!

 

My Postpartum With Wesley

Now that it’s three months since I had Wesley, I should finally get around to writing about my postpartum recovery which I was meaning to do!

In the hospital: After giving birth, I was so relieved but also my muscles were super sore. Luckily I had the after baby high for a bit but when that wore off, my body ached. My sweet nurse offered to draw me a bath to help relax the soreness and oh my gosh that was the BEST IDEA EVER! I felt so much better afterwards. One thing about doing it unmedicated was that my recovery was so much easier! I could walk around easily and no spinal headache like I had with Eli. We were even thinking about leaving the hospital earlier than the usual 48 hours but I’m glad we didn’t. It gave Wesley a little bit more time to adjust and I got some more breastfeeding support. So we stayed Saturday night and Sunday night. Monday morning, I woke up to my milk having come in very strongly. With a nipple shield and a hand pump, we were able to at least relieve me a bit. I did have some trouble with anxiety on Saturday and I think that was a bit exacerbated by my milk coming in.

At home: The first week was quite hellish. I have figured out that my body does NOT react well to the abrupt change in hormones after having a baby. I did not know what to expect when I had Eli so I crashed and burned because of it. Luckily, this time I just slipped and fell a bit. I struggled with anxiety and I could almost feel the hormones in my body causing it. It led to me struggling to sleep even when circumstances allowed me to. This also made my anxiety get worse. I went to my OB office and they gave me some medicine to help cope which it did but only after a few days. The anxiety peaked Thursday night when I was up all night long having panic attack after panic attack. It was like my body was on overload and would not calm down. This led to depression starting to creep in along with bad thoughts which scared me but because of Eli, I wasn’t taken off guard. When morning came, we decided to take me to the ER so that I could reset. I talked with a counselor and they gave me some stronger medicine there that would help me sleep right away. I was able to sleep for 6 hours straight while my angel mom, husband, and aunt helped take care of the boys. This reset plus the other medicine starting to work helped me feel better. Also the hormones leveling out probably made the biggest difference. 

Overall, this time was a ton better than with Eli. I was able to catch things earlier, had extra help with Adam off work and my mom staying with us, and I was able to have a better perspective on things. With Eli, it surprised and scared me to feel so out of control which made the depression worse. Plus I didn’t have as much help and Adam wasn’t prepared for it. This time around, I knew that my body was going through major changes so I didn’t expect to feel like myself. Mostly I just needed to find a way to calm my body down so it didn’t react as if the house was on fire. I only needed to take something to help me sleep for a few days until things got better. Even though postpartum is difficult no matter what, I think I can safely say I haven’t had postpartum depression this time! I am so glad because it has allowed for me to bond with Wesley better and establish breastfeeding. Hopefully, I will be able to use these tools to have an even better time with any future babies! Even if my body seems to be allergic to postpartum hormones haha

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July Update

Here is how this past month went!

Adam: turned 29 this month!! We celebrated by having a get together with some family in the afternoon and then that evening we went to find a spot to watch the local fireworks show (while trying to avoid parking and traffic). The day after he got a special visit from his brother Seth and his family. That was probably his favorite birthday gift because we had someone to play games with haha. He also went back to work and has been amazing at balancing his work stresses, home stresses, and lack of sleep. He is a HUGE support for me breastfeeding as well. We kinda gave up on him taking a feeding since I'd have to wake up to pump anyways but he always gets Wesley and brings him to me and also settles him down if he needs it. He is the best husband and father.

Ashley: I spent the first half of the month trying to find a new normal with Adam at work while trying to prepare for family visiting. The second half of the month, I had to find a NEW new normal because my mom had left after staying with us for a month from when Wesley was born. It was kind of intimidating being home all day with the boys by myself at first but we're getting used to it haha. I am SOOOOO grateful that my mom could come and help for such a long time. It was such a sacrifice of her energy and time but made a huge difference in how my postpartum time went.

Eli: has LOVED having family visit. He enjoyed my mom being here and was ecstatic when all of his grandparents were here along with his aunts, uncles, and cousin on my side and two uncles and aunts and a cousin on Adam's side all came to visit this month. Honestly, I was expecting a full on meltdown when everyone left after the blessing but he did so well saying goodbye. He's definitely growing up in a lot of ways! He's especially gotten more into creative pretend play recently. He will often give me cars and have conversations between them and his cars haha. I love seeing his imagination grow and process things. He loves Wesley and hasn't been too jealous of him. More often than not, he gets mad because he wants to do things like hold and feed him but he can't. It will be fun to see if they'll play well once Wesley can actually play haha.

Wesley: turned 1 month old this month! His head control is getting better but still quite wobbly. He also started smiling this month! That of course is my favorite :) He's a good eater except when my milk comes out too fast. Then he unlatches and gets sprayed in the face haha. We're still troubleshooting how to help his perpetual gassiness but we're pretty sure its my overactive letdown. He has started balding on top and looks like an old man. His favorite thing is to sit on my lap with his back leaning against my thighs as I sit with my knees up. He loves to see our faces and that is how we get the most smiles. He still wakes up quite a few times at night but occasionally will go a 3 or 4 hour stretch! He is a super sweet baby and is now over 11 lbs already so he's quickly becoming a chunk!

Special Events This Month
Fourth of July and Adam's birthday as mentioned above :)
We had Wesley's baby blessing! We were so happy that so many family were able to travel to share it with us. We definitely had a packed house that weekend! It was also the first time my whole family had been together now that Jessica is married (and of course Wesley joining us). So we had to get a family photo which was interesting with a kindergartner and a toddler to try and contain haha. It was a fun, crazy, happy weekend!

Wesley's Birth Story

After a month, it’s probably about time for me to write Wesley’s birth story before I forget haha. So here it is!

I had been having inconsistent contractions for days so it was hard to tell if I was close to labor at all. The night of the 15th, my mom, Adam, and I watched a movie and I was feeling really crampy. Not like contractions but like really bad period cramps. My due date was the next day and I was feeling discouraged that I may go late. So we went to bed. Then at about 4:30 am, I woke up with pretty bad contractions. I realized pretty quickly that they were consistent so I woke up Adam to help me through them and time them. I also had to go to the bathroom a ton xP. One of the times I went, there was bright blood when I wiped almost like starting a period which worried me. We called my doula to let her know what was going on and then labor and delivery to check if we should be worried about the blood. They said not to worry unless it was a ton and that I could just come in when my contractions were about 3 minutes apart. I debated taking a bath to help me cope but my contractions were pretty close together so we decided to just go to the hospital. At this point, I started feeling anxiety about going through labor again. Adam was busy gathering the last of our things so I went upstairs and woke up my mom. She helped me through a few contractions until we were ready to head out.

We got to the hospital about 6 or 6:30 and got settled into our room. My doula Meagan then met us there. They gave me a hep lock (basically a catheter in your vein so they don't have to find one in an emergency but its not connected to anything) and thankfully I didn't need an IV the whole labor. They checked me at 7 and I prepared myself that I wasn’t going to be much but I was at 5 cm! 3 hours and I was already halfway there! For those who don’t know, I was in labor for nearly two days with Eli and I got stuck at 6 cm. Unluckily, I was having back labor again. This worried me but I tried to stay focused on my hypnobirthing. I spent a lot of time either on the birth ball or standing, always leaning on Adam and Meagan giving counter pressure on my back and hips. The nurses and my OB were super supportive of my birth plan and didn’t bother us too much. I did wireless monitoring so I could move around but it kept flipping out of place and then beeping at me which was annoying.

At around 8:50, I started to feel downward pressure and I thought I might be starting to feel pushy but I wasn’t sure. They checked me again and originally I didn’t want them to tell me the result. I said out loud “I’m only at a 5 or 6 aren’t I” again preparing myself for no progress. But I was at a 9! Two hours going from a 5 to a 9 was just the encouragement I needed to believe I could do this. Only problem now was I couldn’t go in the tub anymore :(

So I kept going and worked on breathing Wesley down with each contraction. At this point I did a lot of moaning and standing while leaning on Adam. The contractions were getting more and more intense and I was having more trouble focusing through them. They checked me again at 10:10 and I was mostly 10 cm but I still had a lip of cervix that hadn’t dilated fully due to Wesley being posterior. They offered to break my water to help move things along but I decided against it. So I got to lay on my side with a peanut ball between my legs. This was definitely not as comfortable as being able to move and I was starting to feel out of control. Adam worked hard to keep me calm but I struggled. 

At 11:20, they checked me again and I still had a little bit of cervix left. However this is about the time when my body took control and everything went super fast. I pretty much lost focus completely and started screaming with each contraction. They kept telling me to breathe but I was having a hard time focusing to take a breath so I asked for the oxygen mask to help me. Then my body started pushing without me really trying haha. I could feel him moving so I told them he was coming and at this point, the nurses told me to not push so my doctor could get there. That was pretty much the worst because I couldn’t stop it or hold back so I was just laying on the bed kinda writhing. Meagan came hurrying back from the bathroom when she saw everyone frantically going into our room. My OB barely had time to get a gown on and almost forgot her gloves before she had to catch the baby. I started full on pushing at 11:30 and my water wasn’t broken or bulging. He almost was born en caul (still in the amniotic sack) because the bag was tight around his head but as soon as he started crowning, it broke. Then he was born at 11:34 am.

They placed him in my chest and I got to do a ton of skin to skin. I noticed that his head wasn’t cone shaped and they said that was because he didn’t spend much time in the birth canal since he came so fast. He also had a ton of dark brown hair haha. My OB delayed the cord clamping and even showed me the cord before cutting it just like I wanted. At 11:40, I gave a slight push and delivered the placenta which she also showed me (I think it’s so crazy and cool that my body created an organ to sustain a baby). I only had a small tear enough for one stitch. I mostly just tried to focus on Wesley while they numbed me to stitch it.

I have to say that the hospital (Mountain View in Idaho Falls) and my OB (Dr. Huggins) were AMAZING at following my birth plan. Pretty much everything I wanted they did and never pushed on anything. I had the natural birth that I was wanting and the after birth care that I didn’t get with Eli. They didn’t do any checks or anything until at least an hour after he came out so he just stayed on my chest. He didn’t cry but just was breathing calmly. After his checks (weighing 6 lb 10 oz and measuring at 19 inches), I was super sore so they suggested I take a warm bath which felt amazing! Then they moved me to a postpartum room where we spent a couple days. Here's a post about my recovery.

Overall, I am so glad I got to have a natural unmedicated birth. Was it crazy hard? Yes. Especially the last part where I lost control of my body. Thankfully that was one of the shortest periods. But the recovery was SO much easier than with Eli. No episiotomy, no spinal headache from the epidural, and no trying to shower with a big bandage on my back. Even though a part of it was luck of a smooth circumstance, I am so proud of myself for accomplishing my goal of doing this. And thank goodness the labor was only 7 hours rather than 40!! Thank you Wesley for coming faster than your big brother haha :)

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